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I look in the mirror. My hair is combed back. The press of my shirt looks strong. I grin at myself, checking my smile. Everyone likes a good set of teeth. There’s nothing more embarrassing than chatting it up with someone, only for them to point out you’ve got something stuck between them. Not tonight though. Everything’s falling into place. I dare say, I’m looking damn handsome tonight.
I can feel her eyes on me though. Behind me, mocking me.
“You don’t actually think you’re going to get anywhere tonight, do you?”
With a flick of the switch, the lights are off. Coat over my shoulder, I grab my keys and make my way out to my car. I’ve got a double date tonight with a good friend. I kinda like the girl, and I’m riding high on my confidence. Why should I listen to her?
“You’re going to blow it. Not like I need to tell you. Just try not to make a scene this time, or you’ll never get over this.”
Her words seem shrill to me, but whatever. She’s just jealous, I remind myself. Tonight, I’m leaving it all behind me.
I meet my friend at the diner’s bar. Alex is sporting a look tonight too. It’s easier for him though. He’s got a nice build. Solid jawline, strong hands, and an agreeable personality to boot. He’s everyone’s friend at the office. Outside the office, everyone’s friends with him. With the ladies, maybe even moreso.
My martini helps to relax my nerves, and soon we’re making small talk about the office. The new guy at work, as well as some of the new corporate policy changes that some of the higher-ups have been discussing as of recent. It’s too easy to talk about work every waking hour, though. Our attention soon turns to the possibilities with and Jenny and Allison.
“She’s been interested in you,” Alex remarks. “She’s been asking Aly about you these past couple of days. They know we’re good friends, and Aly has been asking what your hobbies are, and what you think about her.”
“What’d you tell her?”
He looks at me, as if he were surprised I would ask such a question. After all these years. “I told her the truth. You’re a good guy. I’m telling ya, you two should be able to get something going tonight. I have a sense for these things. You two click well.”
We both take a swig. No sooner are the drinks down our mouths that we hear the friendly hellos of our dates. We turn to meet them. They look stunning. Allison is wearing a royal blue silk top with a complementing skirt, but I’m not with her. My eyes are on Jenny. She has on a conservative but alluring black dress. The fabric comes down to knees, allowing some of her legs to show. The straps allow for the for her chest to stand a little more prominently. Her coat is folded over her arm, and already I am entranced by her elegance. She’s smiling back at me. I can tell she likes what she sees.
After greeting each other, bursa escort we find the headwaiter and let him know our party is ready. We order the girls their drinks at the bar, and soon enough the wait-staff lets us know our table is ready. I cordially let Jenny ahead of me, and help her to her seat.
In a genuine voice, she thanks me. I catch a reassuring look from Alex. The ambience is intimate and inviting. I can do this.
The conversations quickly take off. We go from how they’re doing to how the day has been for them, and soon enough Jenny and I are talking about her cat’s misadventures this morning. Alex and Allison are off on their own conversations. It’s between us now. We go back and forth, between our similar childhood disasters at piano lessons to our more recent free-time hobbies.
Our food arrives. Everyone’s ordered modest-sized dishes, which works to our advantage. The conversations keep rolling. Dinner is merely a device for the evening. She has a look in her eyes. Like she’s peeling back layers of me, delighted by what she finds as she digs deeper. She’s warm and inviting. I feel a resonance with her. It’s like she’s what I’ve been looking for all this time.
Dinner wraps up. Alex and I split the bill, trying to show chivalry is not yet dead. Plenty of energy still exists within our group, and we head a block down to a little club we know. The band tonight is lively, and we’re all eager to dance. Jenny motions deliberately for her coat. I help her, sliding the sleeves over her arms. It brings me closer to her, and she grows happier with my demeanor.
We arrive, and the band is underway. The cover paid, we find an open table. The girls head to the bathroom to freshen up, but not before Alex and I get their drink orders.
“Going pretty good, from what I can gauge,” Alex says to me as we wait at the bar. “I told you – you two would hit it off. Like I said, I have a knack for these types of things.”
“She is wonderful, isn’t she? Do you think there’s a chance?”
“Dude, don’t even think like that,” Alex cautions me. “You’re having fun, right? Why weigh yourself down? You two are having a great time, so just keep having fun. It’ll work itself out. You’ll see.”
We return to the table, and soon enough, the Jenny and Allison return too. Our attempts at conversation are hampered by the loud music, but we did not come here to talk. After a few songs, Jenny head out to the dance floor.
A nervous wave crashes over me as mix in with the other dancers. Memories cry out to me that I am not much of a dancer. It doesn’t seem like Jenny minds though. She’s smiling anyways, keeping her eyes on me. I can’t help but keep my eyes on her. Her gaze, new and intriguing twenty minutes ago, is suddenly all-too familiar.
Dancing to the music in her black dress, her moves quickly mesmerize and bursa escort bayan enchant me. Every bounce of her hair, every graze of her arms against mine etch an image in my head. Her hips sway as her arms click to the beat of the music.
It’s around then reality catches up to me. I start asking myself why I’m up here with her. How does a guy like me end up with a gal like her? I can’t measure up to her. Her degrees, her hobbies. I’m in over my head. My rationale reminds me of the problem: she deserves better. After all, She has better.
Jenny is even quick to notice that I’m distracted by my own thoughts. She moves in closer to me with the start of the next song. Her chest rests up against mine as our hands clasp. She moves my body with hers, placing my hands alongside her hips. In the dim lighting, she becomes exotic. Forbidding, even. She transcends to another level of intimacy. Her smile, the movements of her body, ask me to follow along with her.
I can’t. I never could. I don’t belong here. If I can’t keep up with her, I can’t have her. Why torture myself with fleeting success if I’m just going to bomb it in the end?
Feeling her body next to mine, I’m slapped with the harsh reality that this is as close to happiness as I’ll ever get. I sustain enough courage to finish the song before breaking away from her.
“I’m sorry, I have to go.”
The look on her face pains me. It’s a lie, I tell myself. This is all a lie for the big joke later. It’s too late now anyway. I must finish what I began.
“I just can’t keep doing this tonight. I’ve got other things I should be getting to. I’m sorry. If you’d like a ride home, I’m be more than happy to offer you one.”
“Oh,” she says. Her eyes, new at dinner and familiar here, now capture the absolute shock washing over her. “No, that’s, that’s fine. I came here with Ally, after all. I should be able to catch a ride with her.”
I nod my head. I was just being cordial. It’s something guys are supposed to do. “Okay. Thanks for a lovely evening though.” I can’t bear to be an ass any longer. With a wave goodbye I make haste for the lobby. I think I caught Alex’s look of confusion on the way out, but I’m not about to turn around and confirm it.
I steadily hurry back to the parking lot where my car waits. I fumble for my keys, not wanting to delay my exit in front of them any longer. I would not be able to face them, if I could. I quickly hop in and head back home.
The ride home is excruciating. I try to distract myself from recounting the evening. It is not easy, everything is so fresh. The smell Jenny’s perfume, when she pressed her body against mine, lingers still in my nostrils. My heart still leaps when I remember how warm she felt. The question ‘why?’ surfaces, as it always has. As always, I ignore it.
I return home. If I can just escort bursa put the day behind me, I’ll be set. I just need to change and crawl into bed.
She’s waiting for me there. My sheepish attitude speaks for how I messed up the evening. She knew I was coming home. Smiling, she readies to sink her teeth into me.
“Blew it again, didn’t you? What did I tell you? You can’t escape this.”
I try to ignore her, entering my home and quickly changing out of my clothes. If I can ignore her nagging, I’ll be free.
“What was it this time? Her smile? Her femininity? The fact that she’s everything you want, and that she can bring you happiness?”
I tell her to shut up, but I know it is useless. This is not the first time I’ve come home to her to hear this. She’s been there ever since I’ve met her. She continues to haunt me, and I can’t let her go.
She mocks me as I make my way to bed. I crawl under the sheets, but just as I expected, she huddles in with me. “Why do you even try? You cant give me up. You need me. You want me to need you. If you have me here, then don’t fight me. Do to me as you always want to do.”
I can feel her coaxing my cock. She always does this to me. My cock springs to life with it’s newfound attention. She wastes no time. The sheets are scattered. I can see her impaled on my cock, her eyes penetrating through me, riding my shaft with a victorious smile gleaming from her face.
“Oh, this feels good. You like this, don’t you? Mmm yeah, fuck me. Fuck me like you’ve always wanted to.”
Her breasts are heaving, calling out to me. Her hands caress her flesh, attending to the demand to be touched. I can see desire manifest in the hardening of her nipples The moans I hear plead me to touch her, to hold her as a lover would. But I can’t. Regret flows over me, knowing that I can’t.
“You still want this, don’t you?” she asks, leaning her body on top of mine. Her breasts close in on my chest. I can practically feel them. “It’s always so good with you. You enjoy having me, don’t you?”
My cock continues to be milked by her form. My breathing increases, as does hers. We’re working to the same climax, as it has been for every night which I’ve lusted after her. I can feel my impending release rising within.
She cries out to me. Envisioning her body grinding against mine, her breasts bouncing as her face contorts in orgasmic pleasure sends me over the edge. My prick erupts, ejaculating its load.
My hand is covered in seed. In my hesitation, the creamy mess trickles down the back of my hand, getting caught in my pubic hairs. She’s done it again, fucking with my mind. The seed was planted long ago. Once again, she’s reaped her bounty, forgoing my happiness to own me.
In cleaning myself off, I reflect on the past. I ask myself how long this has been going on, and how much longer it must continue. I still cannot get her out of my mind. Every day, every thought on my mind is about her. I can hear her laughing at me now, as I wipe the semen off me. She consumes me, as she always has, and forever will.
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